Recently I talked with my Mom and Dad about their wedding in 1977. They both remember it like it was yesterday. You might think my Dad spent the morning getting dressed and waiting for the wedding to start, but there was more to it than that. The reception was to take place in the cafeteria of St. Pius X School, so Dad went over that morning to help get the room ready. There had been Bingo the night before, so my Dad, on the morning of his wedding, emptied out the ashtrays and helped set up tables. Then he went over to Lazarus, a department store at Eastland Mall, to pick up a cheese slicer so that they could make homemade pizza on their honeymoon.
The day before the wedding, my mom remembers putting the finishing touches on some homemade decoupage pieces she was preparing to give as gifts to the lector and musicians who would be in their wedding Mass. Mom explained to me that decoupage involved burning the edges of a sheet of paper containing artwork or writing in order to give the edges some character, gluing it to a piece of wood, then preserving it with coats of clear shellac. Very 70’s. I’m not at all surprised that my mom spent the waning hours of her single life using her creativity to serve others. That is just who she is.
She also talked to me about how much they were both filled with joy on the day of the wedding. As they faced each other before the altar, their faces were shining. It’s no surprise to me that they were radiant, because their humble self-giving put them in touch with the joy of the Lord.
I smile thinking about my dad emptying ashtrays and running errands and my mom crafting. That is who they are: humble, hardworking people who aren’t afraid to get their hands dirty in order to serve those they love. Their willingness to serve others prepared them to lay down their lives for each other in marriage.
Jesus speaks about the importance of dying to self in the Gospel today. He is coming close to the time where He knows He will give of Himself fully to bring new life to all humanity. When Philip and Andrew bring Jesus the news that even Greeks, foreigners from nations other than Israel, are beginning to seek Him, He knows that the time has come for Him to enter into the Glory of His Passion and Resurrection so that His new life can spread to every corner of the world. He says, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified.” And then immediately He ties that glory to the fact that it will come through His death and self-offering.
The image of the grain of wheat that falls to the ground and is destroyed in the process of bringing forth new growth is a rich one. We all know that seeds are destroyed in the process of new life coming forth. Even in the natural world, we see the paradoxical link between death and new life. Jesus knew that by suffering for all of us and dying the death of the Cross, He would surrender His life so that all of us might be reborn through the power of His resurrection.
As members of His Church, we too are called to follow the path of death and new life that Jesus has traced out for us through the Cross. In our Baptism, we mysteriously share in the dying and rising of Jesus. We go down into the waters, symbolizing death, and rise renewed and reborn at our core, freed from all stain of original sin. That sanctifying grace is renewed in our hearts every time we encounter the love of Jesus in the Sacrament of Reconciliation.
The invitation for all of us today is to embrace that pattern of dying for the sake of new life through every circumstance of our lives. I am blessed to have grown up in a family where being the grain of wheat which falls to the ground and dies in order to bear fruit was regularly on display for me in both of my parents. Of course they aren’t perfect; no parents are. But I can see many, many ways in which my life has been blessed through their self-giving. Their willingness to sacrifice comfort and many other things for themselves has blessed me and my siblings by helping us to get through school, to discover and grow in our passions and interests, and to flourish in our adult years as parents, teachers, and myself as a priest, to name just a few ways. Even now, I can see how both of my parents continue to look for ways to pour themselves out for us, for their friends and for their parish.
Day by day, each of us is called to prayerfully discover those ways Jesus invites us to join Him in that dying which brings the fruit of new life. When we look for ways to not cling too tightly to what we’ve been blessed with, but to bless others through our lives and gifts, then we begin to truly live.
I am so grateful to see how the self-giving of so many in our parish family is bearing fruit in the lives of our families, our young people, our shut-ins, those in need and our friends and relatives. The more we all look to embrace that model of dying to self for others, the more God will continue to bless our parish. We can each bear more fruit than we could possibly imagine by simply offering what we’ve been given back to the Lord in humble service.
Jesus challenges us by saying, “Whoever loves his life loses it, and whoever hates his life in this world will preserve it for eternal life.” When He speaks of hating our life in this world, He doesn’t mean that we should despise life, but that we should value the new life we’ve been given in Jesus above all else. The term translated to English as ‘hate’ was a term in this context indicating that you love something less. So in this context Jesus’ call is to allow His love and His new life in us to be the love and the life that we cling to and prioritize above all. When we do this, we will see more and more the abundant blessing that Jesus will pour out through us to all those in need: our spouses, children, families, friends, and even our enemies.
In this way we will prepare ourselves for that glory to which Jesus has destined us through our Baptism, not the false glory of the self-centered life which ultimately leads to death, but the Heavenly Glory which, with faith, we can see in the Cross: the glory of a life poured out and thus drawn up into God who is our life, and who constantly pours Himself out in love. With God’s ever-present help, let’s strive for that glory together!
+ Heavenly Father, thank you for the model of self-outpouring love that you give us in your Son. Lord Jesus, help us to trust that our true glory comes in dying to ourselves. Holy Spirit, stir into flame your gifts in our hearts so that we might live our lives in the abundant joy of service to you and others. We ask this through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen. +